that the opposite of truth is beauty...

I do not supply answers, only questions. I do not supply solutions, only problems. I do not supply faith, only doubt. I do not supply truth, only fiction. I do not supply dogs, only cats. I do not supply sounds, only silence. I do not supply reason, only anarchy. I do not supply logic, only insanity. I do not supply movement, only inactivity. I do not supply consistency, only chaos. I don't supply sustenance, only famine. I don't supply relevance, only art.

EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE!

I was awake for like... I don't know, a while. I can't give an exact estimate. I was listening to music... for about eighteen hours. Than I watched a mini series... a little more than half of it I think. That took about three or four hours. And than I played The Sims 3 for about sixteen hours.and there was other stuff too... I checked the internet periodically. After I was finished with the sims three I went on this site, tried to use the forums buy I could barely make sense of anything by that time. Full blown zombie mode.

So I went to sleep around eleven at night and I had some weird dreams. Killer dolls with knives, I was a heroine addict, but I really wasn't... I was a writer, an author and the main character of the book I was writing was an addict. I was just living his life for a bit so I understood the character. And I realized we had much in common. It was all very strange...

I woke up at one thirty. Even more exhuated than when I went to sleep. Oh and I'm supposed to wish these two cancers birthdays. Rev and The Warrior... who can't spell the word warroir. Actually I'm not sure if rev's birthday was recently or if it was all a joke... or it was over the past few months, so she may not be a cancer after-all. But I know for a fact that my brother is...

I'm a lion... rawr. grrr. meow. ribbit.

I'm not the sick demented person who came up with this. I just wish I was. But I'm not wired that way. My favorite part is Scipio's deal breaker, it really makes you think...

Starts:
Okay they're like Plastic, right? Or something? And plastic isn't natural, it lasts forever. Which is fine, when the girls is alive. But she's going to die one day. And when she does they're gonna bury her with them. And then her corpse is going to rot. And her organs will liquify. And her skin will slough off, and after a while her clothes will be gone too. And than she's a skeleton. with BREASTS.

and that's what the archeologists will find.
:End quote
I don't have to worry about my deal breaker. Because lesbians do not like guys so I'm safe. Don't get me wrong I have nothing agianst lesbians... it's just that half the women in my family are lesbians so it's weird and it's a bit of a turn off for me. I could never fap to lesbian porn because my mother would come to mind. It's just too weird and awkward.

I'd like to have my music on top, but it just doesn't look any good that way. I need my page to keep itself stylin'. maybe I can find a happy-medium... but not a happy meal. Becuase that's not any good.

Shit! I've run out of food. I made a grave miscalculation. I could die... Unless I go out and hunt right now, but I don't have any buckshot left. So this is what it comes down to I guess. Oh well, I had a good run. I might be a little delirious at the moment but I don't really mind. it's all cool. I'm okay...

Oh wait, I could order a pizzas. Why don't I try that... only I don't trust the pizza guy. He's a smarmy smartass nob. Thinks he's better than me with his license and his high school diploma. I have a diploma too... but it's from a crappy public school. And not every public school is bad, but mine was terrible.

They gave me my diploma even though I never learned out to count properly. True story. yup... Why aren't I banned from the BBS yet. Stupid mods, they never ban me, no matter what I say. I guess, "you're mother smells like a shrew." just isn't as offensive as it once was back in 2015.

If you can read this, YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY WON!!! Your continued payment of entropy qualifies you as a PREMIUM GOLD member of LIFE signing you up for a chance to WIN FABULOUS PRIZES!

3 EASY STEPS
1) Forward this to at least TWO of ur favorite planets.
2) Sign them up for LIFE and collect there entropic fees.
3) The more you sign up, the great YOUR chances are of WINNING FABULOUS PRIZES!!!/

But wait there's more...

Transcranial Direct Current Stimulation!

Ingredients:

One (1) brain, inside skull
One (1) 9-volt battery
Two (2) wires
Two (2) damp sponges

Instructions:

Attach battery to wires, attach wires to sponges, attach sponges to skull, one over each eyebrow. Simmer once a day until mental health reaches a firm consistency.

Disclaimer:

If your experiments end up giving you a permanent facial tic, a lasting case of impotence, or your dog starts talking about the Antichrist, don't come crying to us.

I was just slithering on through the past with my time machine. revisiting the good times... you remember the good times right? Way back in the May. And there were some moments of foreshadowing awesome even before that. such as... the number 32. I think that is my highest post count and I do not think I will beat that anytime soon... nor will I try.

I was just looking through my old post for a few reasons one being that Duiliath suddenly and unexpectedly appeared at my profiles doorstep, welcome back! When I skimmed through I noticed all the cool people that I know from this site. I'll start with Duiliath since he was already mentioned. Before the mayhem of may I recall this guy from before. He was smart and very charismatic. Before long he'll have people swarming his profile once news of his return has spread.
Another person I recall from before, from at least as far back as Duiliath, is Nietzlawe... who is an amazing writer who never ceases to amuse me with his wordplay and wit.
Since we're on the track of people I had talked to early on I'd say the next two would be Andhination and Nacale. Both of those people I had been talking to a few months prior to may. Andhination actually nominated me for Least Appreciated Newgrounds User in the Portal awards thing last year. We had a few good conversations. And Nacale is... Nacale, an artist who is almost always upbeat and interesting.

Proottalfain was the person who demanded I post may bearded face. Which was just ridiculous enough for me to actually try it. And the reaction was surprising and quite frankly hilarious. I really didn't expect it. Prootalfain is very well liked on this site and for obvious reasons. He's intelligent and has a good sense of humor.
Sinitech, That man is more crazy than he let's on. Don't let him fool you. Nah he's cool. A conversation with him is always bound to be... not terribly healthy. A bad influence... But he isn't a pedophile. You have his word.
One strange sight was the rare comments by Sensationalism sprinkled throughout the pages. Come on, that user has to much NG cred to be posting on my profile. It's a god damn scandal is what it is.

The rest are either inactive or uninteresting to me. But the people I've put up here are my e-bodies I guess. Though I wouldn't take a bullet for any of them or send them Christmas cards (or whatever it is friends do) if I had never interacted with them on this site... than... hmmm... I don't know. Speculation on that hypothetical scenario is a bit difficult to conceive. I could be completely unchanged or I could be stark raving mad. Hell I might even be able to think of results were my life is a bit improved if I never used the internet... though none of them are more entertaining.

So if you're listed you better feel all appreciated and special for it. Because I probably wont do this kind of thing again (today). Now you can all get piss drunk and start a rave/riot. Hell do both for all I care. I'm sleepy and irritated and I'm going to go take a nap... oh, um... sinisterly. Yes, I'll nap sinisterly.

hmmm, I'm actually supposed to run a crazy little D&D game. I don't know the rules, or read any of the books or understand what I'm supposed to do. I haven't really played this game with the guys since I was in high school... but we're gonna hang out for a little bit and try to run a game. Somehow I was chosen to be the DM. Also it's fourth edition... I have no idea what that means. Never really played this game before...

All I know is I get to come up with the structure of the story. I know it's supposed to be a fantasy adventure, but I'm not feeling it. How about something with alternate dimensions and Elder Gods who are resurfacing from the past to devour the newer races pathetic pantheons.

Perhaps their gods don't even really exist at all and the true creators of the multiverse are going to seep into their little medieval society and devour their souls. The party will be running about chasing goblins or whatever when BAM eldergod starts to bend the confines of reality. I'll suddenly go insane and all hell breaks lose.

"so last time we gamed you were in the town of Applehelm. You had rested at the Predictable Pony Tavern. When you awoke the next day you tried to stop at the shopkeep's to buy some potions or some shit. Unfortunately they refused to sell anything to you... and they had tentacles growing out of there eyes. It was a bit... disturbing. So what do you do now." I would look at the group expectantly.
"I'm going back to the tavern." the fighter type would say.
"No." I'd respond. "It has vanished." I would say no more on the matter. Not explaining where it has gone or what has happened.
"I'm going to return to the shopkeep's and try to steal the items we wanted to buy." the rogue type would say.
"The shop is still there... but all the traders and crafters and their wares have melted into some kind of caustic goo. They are unresponsive." I would describe.
"I'm getting the fuck out of this fucked up town!" the wizard type would state!
"NO!" I would say in a shrill voice drenched in insanity! "There is no escape! He is here!"
"I pray to my Gods and ask them to protect us." The cleric type would announce.
"They do not listen." I say. "The sky has darkened the air is full of an electricity that fills your with unease and and despair. What do you do?"
"I walk down the street back towards the tavern." The wizard says.
"You die." I look at the rest of the group. "What do you do."
"Hey, wait, how did I die... don't I get some sort of will save or..."
"No. You die." I state, without any reason. "the rest of the party sees a gazebo."
"I uh... hang out inside the gazebo?" the rogue type says with a shrug.
"It attacks you. You die!" I announce loudly, as I grab the rogues character sheet and rip it up. "The other players see a friendly ally willing to help."
"Oh, that's good. We talk to the ally." The cleric says.
"He attacks you. You die!!!" I shout.
"I attack the ally with my sword!" The fighter says. I look at him menacingly.
"The man turns to smoke when you slice him apart... and he dissipates in the wind. But at the same time your hostile energy is returned to you. You're mind is shattered by it, and... YOU DIE!!!"
And so the players would never ever talk to me again. And everyone lived happily ever after.

That is how I'd run a D&D campaign. Yeah... now THAT would be fun. If that was how the game worked I think I might actually play it. Should I send Wizards of the Coast and e-mail or something? Nah... they wouldn't listen to me anyway.

And now you must beat box your way through the dungeon. It is the only way.

A late night post that will posted about two in the afternoon. Around the time I wake up. So what was I supposed to inform you people about... hmmm, I seem to have forgotten. Perhaps I recall it later, perhaps I'm searching for the next new and exciting adventure even though I don't know what it will be.

Until than I have in front of me a box of cookies, a knife, a troll doll a shot glass and a bottle of TryMe® Tiger Sauce. Let's do this like Buddhists.

Freewinds up against the Peacemaker.

You'd think that the Scientologists would have the upper hand. But I don't know, The Twelve Tribes seem pretty scrappy. Sure you may be thinking to yourselves, "WTF why?"

Well the reason why is becuase I'd like to see how the two pseudo-cults would face off in a battle of brute force. Since Elbert Eugene Spriggs and Lafayette Ronald Hubbard wont be getting into a battle fo fist-a-cuffs anytime soon especially since Hubbard's dead, I suspect he'd still kick Spriggs ass. Although I think that that's how the fight between the cult leaders would go down, as far as the followers go... a Twelve Tribesmen could totally trash a Scientologist any day.

But on the high seas... a place where improbability and uncertainty rule. Where rule of law (that means the scientologists wont have there lawyers to protect them) and public image (the twelve tribes wont have there PR team) have no influence. who can say....

But honestly, who wouldn't want to see a cheesy cruise ship try to ram a glorified galley?